To the land of take 'what you want':

As I begin writing about a couple of years of my childhood which I consider were the best amongst the rest,I can not find a befitting beginning. While I try to come up with a title I have already tried all the text sizes and erased whats supposed to the opening line like a 100 times. Its then I remember my most favourite storyteller, and that story that goes beyond all boundaries of reality .

The faraway tree by Enid Blyton, never found a place on the shelf. It just was too special to adorn that shelf too proud to lie amongst others I had read. It was my constant companion to school,at the dining table,and in my dreams.That where my dreams emerged  from. I was that invisible friend Jo,Bessie and Fanny had and had absolutely no idea about.

Today as I am 22 I think of the story in a different context. While as  a child I had no world better than that of my dreams where I could write a few chapters on my own,today I have trouble dreaming. The childish fears have been replaced by adult calculated once. I have come to believe the bitter reality – there is no Land of “take what you want” in real life! I don’t know when, growing up I lost my belief in myself. I don’t know when the transition happened from wandering carelessly in the woods to having a plan for each and every second of life.To go and stand in the line where other ‘logical’ people stood. Having time but never having enough. Have dreams but not having faith enough.

I am running each day,but I hardly seem to understand for what? I work, but I do because that’s what I do..i could not find a better explanation to it! It is only now I feel I have to get my head around ‘ follow your heart’s desires’ crap people talk about. I think for once in my life I would like to wander again..without being corrected, without being told where to go and what to do,without being judged. Without the fear of constant security of what’s to come. For once I would like to venture into the worls I can dream free and believe they can happen.

 I think I‘m going to make a start,and I’m going to make it from here. I sat and thought about how I have loved writing…and so when you can’t do some serious writing,you can always write a crappy piece from the feeling of the moment and find someone crazy enough to be interested to read it! Here’s mine..